Blackberry and Crumble are the dogs, not a comment on baking. These are, as we always tell people, great names for dogs until you have to stand in a field shouting them, and then you just sound like a bit of a wally...

Welcome to my thoughts, ponderings and crafty adventures.

Thursday, 6 June 2013

you've got to accentuate the positives...

but not be in total denial about the negatives.

Sometimes, sticking on a happy face and telling the world that, things are marvellous and ticking along nicely is absolutely the thing you have to do. We compare ourselves with others and think, well they are managing so I should too... I usually, very much take the fake it till you make it approach to life. I don't like to admit defeat and nor do I like others to think that things aren't going well.

Two things happened today that made me rethink this, slightly skewed, philosophy.

One: I went to a meeting... I am 20ish percent of the way through a training programme that was hugely competitive to get on and incredibly demanding. A masters in a year, rotating placements, competencies to sign off coming out of our ears and it is really hard (in the interest of balance, its also a huge privilege and exciting), and honestly, I am struggling. 

I sat in a room today with a group of people at varying levels of seniority on the training scheme and looked around at my colleagues and thought, I am the only one struggling with this, and if I tell anyone they will all think that I am rubbish. Well, one of them, over lunch put their hand on mine, and very perceptively asked if I was OK, and bugger it if it turns out that I am a rubbish liar. What followed was a lovely lunchtime where I was encouraged and supported, people were honest about how they were feeling too and were kind and generous in telling me where my strengths lie. We do ourselves and those around us a massive disservice by pretending that things are OK when they are not...

Two: Dad sent me a quote: "asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness" Steve Peters, Consultant Psychiatrist.

Number two just being a shorter and pithier way of saying number one.

Writing this blog and focusing on the positives is fab, reflection is good for the soul and all that and 95% of the time, life is marvellous. I'm happy, healthy, I have family and friends who love me, a job I enjoy (largely) , a nice home etc etc, but I feel really strongly that I owe it to myself and, perhaps even more so, others to be honest and when things are pants, stop, deal with the pants and then get on. Sometimes another person needs to hear that you are struggling, as much as you need to tell them, so they can take a deep breath and say, "you know what, I'm having a really rubbish day too".

That's all, back to the happy...

I blogged about tea. On a whim I tweeted Yorkshire Tea about it and look - free tea bags (future posts on my deep and abiding love for gin, chocolate and leather handbags? Or maybe just more tea!) Sorry about the rubbish photo, I was taking it on my phone in the car so I could send it to HWMBO(I). I was very excited. 

Beautiful day today (it wasn't even raining in Manchester... this is amazing, although some sights were not for the faint hearted... think thoughts along the lines of "dear me, I have more fabric in my pyjamas, what was she / he thinking... that kind of thing)

I've been off looking at the blogs of people who have visited me here (you are a talented, creative and generous bunch, thank you) and I have a head full of crafty lovely that I would like to make.. but it doesn't all need doing straight away. 

Thank you for visiting, commenting and coming back - I wonder if the excitement will wear off?


  1. I think you'll become more addicted, rather than finding the excitement will wear off. I've been blogging since 2007, and I've seen it... The first forays, the place where you can show off your crafty creative side a little, a place where you can admit that you're less than perfect (I'm talking about your reflections in this post, not making an independent value judgment here), and then just as you're wondering about this whole blogging lark, a freebie comes your way! You'll be hooked.

    1. I fear I already am... I feel like I have a blog stream developing in my brain...

  2. No the excitement doesn't wear off - at least not for me anyway - blogging just seems to keep getting better and better.
    In the few weeks - oh how long is it? a couple of months or so - since I began my blog, I have been amazed at the wonderful people I've met and shared with - some of those I feel like I've known forever!
    And the encouragement and pick-ups that are spread across blogland is nothing short of magic in my experience!
    No it doesn't wear off!
    Joy xx

    1. I hope not joy - I'm loving the blog, the people, the whole thing...

  3. I hope not, the blogging community is fairly new to me too but it's a wonderful place to be, I only wish I'd been here sooner. Good for you speaking out we all have this tendency to try and make the best and cope and not show the outside world that underneath we're struggling. Someone once said to me that I was very much like a swan that I was calm and serene but paddling like mad under the surface to stay afloat. They were very so right, now I try and let people know if I'm struggling and like you tend to find out I'm not the only one. Here's to a peaceful and sunny weekend ... Sarah x

  4. I would hate to become a blog where it seems everything is perfect. It's only natural that we want to show our best face on line but if all of blog land is shiney it can only make other people feel bad in comparison (things are generally pretty shiney in my world though) xx

  5. It's a funny old thing. When I meet someone unremittingly positive I tend to find them a little on the scary side. it's when someone opens up to me and lets me know that they're finding it tough/don't get on with their mother-in-law/flipped out about burning the toast - I suppose what I mean is when they admit that they are, indeed, human, that I tend to think we'll be good friends. Odd, eh.
    Btw, I have a wonderful mother-in-law. Genuinely. I'm very lucky about that. I just wanted to add that incase she read this and felt sad!

    1. Exactly that, not odd at all. I think we find our common 'humanness' (or even humanity, which is actually the word) in our flaws.